piatok 24. októbra 2014

If you want

I haven't talk to him for five days. Almost one week. I've been with him in one room, without conversation, without eye contact, without anything.
And then he just appeared.
He passed by my locker in hurry.
He said: "Hi!"
And my stomach was full of air. And butterflies.
I told many times that I just gave up. And that I just let him be.
But I lied.
I'll never let him be.
I just can't. Because when I finally forget, he comes to my life. Again, again. Again. And again.

Today, I saw him, twice. Twice. Unusual. Something's going to happen.
Hall was full of wrong people. The right one was gone.
His back on my sight. Only distance separated us.
Should I?
"Can I be excused?" without hesitation.
"What?" Yoko never understands.
"Oh, okay," Elisabeth's smile. She understood even situation full of misunderstaning.
I wanted to run. Catch up him. But I stayed calm. My steps were faster than acceleration of cars.
He saw me. He saw me. He saw me.
Construction.
We had to choose another way. I knew there was much shorter way, but I just followed him.
Then he turned back. And he saw me.
"Hi!" his smile. I can't forget, even when I want.
"Hello!" it was me.
"How are you?" me and my attempt to keep space between us alive.
Well, I don't remember his answer, but I think he was good. He is always good or "goodish".
He went to see his mom at her work. I just tried to avoid of construction.
"If you want, you can go to my mom's store with me," he and his voice. I think my lungs flew inside my body, I was so light.
"Yes, sure, if you don't mind." I touched my hair.
"I don't mind at all."
So we went.

"Hello, nice to meet you," woman who didn't look like he.
"Nice to meet you," I gave her my smile.
"I'm mother," I liked how she said that word, mother. She tried to made fun on herself.
He was standing next to me. To be honest, I don't remember how he looked like. How his face looked like, if you want details. But I felt those seconds. It was magic.
"Are you going to home or you're going somewhere?" that woman knew...
"Probably at home," he looked at me. I decided - no preassure.
"You look really nice," or "You're eyes are really nice," something like this was addressed to me by his mother. Then she looked at him, at her face was only one - you see, it's easy. I wonder if I ever saw something similar.
It was a cloth store, full of shoes, bags, jeans and shirts.
I'm not kind of girl interested in clothes.
"Are you going to home?" I finally asked. Maybe he planned to stay there.
"Yes," he answered.
"Okay," I just smiled.
"Do you want to go now?" his eyes were so close to mine.
"Well, it's up to you," that was my usual answer.
"If you want, we can go," he hesitatated.
"If you want..." I started to laughing.
"Okay," I think he said something like that.
"It was nice to meet you," my last words to his mom.
"Nice to meet you, have a lovely walk," that's it.
So we went.

Streets were full of cars and people. Messy. Noisy.
I used to be there many times before.
Not comfortable, but not disturbing.
We were talking. Actually, a lot.
Then we came to crossroad.
I was supposed to go home, he was supposted to continue in walking.
But he stayed.
I told him I've never been in old town by myself and I've never walked by the old town. I don't know how, suddenly I had enough courage to asked him: "We can go there, if you want."
"Sure," that was what he said.
And he said that I'm really... polite. I agreed. That's way how my excitement is hidden.
I told him I'll find him on Facebook. And we can make some plans.
Maybe this weekend.
My lungs flew again. They started to be part of my body, there was no reason why they should fly. But at that moment, it was something huge. Huge. Huge. Huge.
Then we just said goodbye. It was time to go home.
So we went.

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